Monday, July 31, 2006

***Im CoNfUsEd***

HAVE YALL EVER LIKED SOMEONE SOO MUCH YOU JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO?WELL THATS WHAT IM FEELING RIGHT NOW.CAUS EYA KNOW,YOUR KINDA SCARED THAT U GUNNA GET REJECTED N SHIT...BUT THIS CHICK SAYS THAT SHE ALSO LIKES ME,BUT IVE BEEN HURT SOO MANY DAMN TIMES...AND IM SCARED TO OPEN UP AND LET ANYONE ELSE LOVE ME....BUT I REALLY LIKE THIS PERSON.IM REALLY THINKING ABOUT GIVEING HER A CHANCE!!!!!
BUT ANYWAYS!!!!!FOREST GUMP SAYS,"LIFE'S LIKE A BOX OF CHOCOLATES,YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU GUNNA GET"?I DUNNO I JUST LOVE THAT SAYING..LOL!!!!!SO,SHIT IS GOING REAL GOOD AROUND HERE AT THE HOUSE...ME AND MY FAMILY REALLY GETTIN ALONG.ME AND MY MOMS BOYFRIEND ARE TALKING ON A REGULAR BASIS.WHICH I HONESTLY THOUGHT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN.
BUT,NOW WERE ALWAYS TALKING AND WHAT NOT!HEY YALL WANNA KNOW SOMETHING FUNNY???I FEEL AS IF MY MAMA CARE ABOUT HER DAMN GOLD FISH AND KOI FISH THEN SHE DOES ABOUT HER 3 KIDS..LOL..I ALWAYS MESS WITH HER...I THINK IT MAKES HER UPSET THOUGH..I DONT SAY IT TO MAKE HER MAD OR UPSET...,LOL!!!
SOOO,MY BIG BUBBA GOT HIS FORD RANGER ON THE ROAD.FRIDAY HE GOT HIS TAG TRANSFERED TO THAT TRUCK..ITS HUGE!!!I THINK ITS SOO PERTTY!!!

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

!!!!!I MISS YALL AT LAKE ACADEMY ONE!!!!!

I MISS MY FAMILY BACK AT THE PROGRAM,IF YALL ARE READING THIS I LOVE YALL AND I MISS YALL...MS.ELIZABETH IF YOU READIN THIS THANX FOR EVERYTHING YOUVE EVER DONE FOR ME YOUR THE BEST!!!!!I CAN NOT WAIT TO SEE YOU AGAIN...YOU HAVE MADE A REAL BIG DIFFERENCE IN MY LIFE..I LOVE YOU!

*****DANIELLE SANDERS*****

.....dads still the same.....

dads still the same ole person....

he says hes gunna be a dad for once but i aint saw it yet....

hes been promiseing me for what 16 years now...

we got into a big ass arguement again....

i told him to never call me again,cause i have nothing to say to him....

hes starting to smoke weed again...well if he ever stopped in the first place....

hes still drinking,like always.....god,why cant i just have a father to be there for me???

instead of just wanting to mbe my friend and shit?!?!

i dont even know how in the hell i am feeling..

i am soo use to being hurt by him and shit....

i cant even feel anything...i am numb to all this shit...

yeah,i still cry every now and then....

but who wouldnt if their father acts the way mine does...

i feel like i aint shit,like i aint got nothing to live for....

i mean....why cant he just realize??what in the hell that he puts me through...

i feel like i HATE him,but yet i feel like i cant cause hes my father....well,imma go now and write about something else....

Monday, July 17, 2006

ShortStory1 cont...

WARNING:SORRY BOUT THE FOUL LANGUAGE,IM EXPRESSING MY FEELINGS!
well i am continuing my short story....
i pretty much grew up in a bad invironment!i mean my mom did everything in her power to make me and my older brother michael by 17 months happy.but it really didnt work too damn well.cause i was soo fuckin miserable growing up.and i knew that my mom and brother was too.i dont really know how the three of us actially survived in all the chaos that "dad" would put us through.
but some way or another we did.yo,the only thing that my dad has done for me was buy me cigerates,weed,ice and alcohol.hes a fuckin piece of shit and most probably always will be.but,i still love him.even through all the shit ive gone through.its already 16 years,i feel like ive gone through soo much in my life.more than a grouwn person has!noone really understands why i do the things i do.honestly,i dont even understand why i do the things that i do.most people say thats my only excuss..but really its not!
i always ask myself why I have to go through all this shit.am i the only one out there?i would like to come across someone that has gone through what i have.but i have not found any luck yet.truely,i hope i never come across anyone that has been through what all i have!because it is nothing fun or exciteing..i look around and i see young kids makeing up lies about their own flesh and blood,their family...i member when i use to try an talk about my family,most people thought i was just another kid looking for some type of attention.but really all of it was true.
yeah,every now and then id stretch it a little bit.but really,i just wanted someone to see all the AGONY that me and my family was going through.damn.....i knnow that i keep getting off subject,its just that i have alot to say.i doubt that ill be done with this so called "short story" anytime soon..lol....

Sunday, July 16, 2006

CHECKUP

YHEY YALL SORRY THAT I AHEVNT BEEN UPDATEING THINGS ON HERE.I HAVE BEEN REALLY BUSY LATELY.TRYING TO ADJUST TO BEING BACK INTO THE COMMUNITY AND NOT THERE IN THE PROGRAM....
BUT OVER ALL THINGS ARE GOING REALLY WELL FOR ME HERE AT HOME WITH MY FAMILY.BUT HONESTLY,I DO MISS MY FAMILY IN THE PROGRAM AT GULF/LAKE ACADEMY...
IF ANY OF YOU GUYS AT THE PROGRAM ARE READING THIS I REALLY MISS YALL,I LOVE YALL...AND I HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN ANYONE!KEEP YOUR HEADS UP AND STAY OUTTA TROUBLE SO YOU CAN GO HOME TO YOUR FAMILY!

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

ShortStory1

have you ever felt so alone...like noone really cared about you,but all your family does is tell you how much they love you and they want you to do right?but you really didnt give a care,and just brushed them aside?

well,ive been there and ive done that.i was young and dumb.but i cannot keep useing that as an excuse.i am still young,only 16..but i have come to realize..after being locked up for about 15 months..

see,i never really got into any trouble.a few battery charges,pety theft....i would get into trouble at school for small things like not being in dresscode,confrontations,etc...but,i dont know what was in me this one day.

i was such an angry teen.ever since i was a todler.mom said since i was able to crawl-walk i was always into things.i would touch everything in sight.but yet,my looks of innosence would fool everybody...

to really make a long story short my parents got divorced when i was in the 5th grade,within a year mom got a new boyfriend,i absolutely hated him!we ended up moveing out here to rockridge in the middle of the woods....

she got pregnant..i was so angry!!i didnt really know what to do!after she had the baby i realized that Logan *baby* was my life!i still didnt care too much for moms boyfriend.

to be continued.......

Friday, June 30, 2006

Vo.5



all four of us grew up together.FROM LEFT:mike(bro),me,chyanne(cousin) and ronnie(cousin)it was real hard on the family cause me chyanne and ronnie all got locked up in the same month.


Vo.4


this is on the same homepass that i was on when i visited my cousin.this is her in the picture with me,also my little brother logan.i really do miss her!i hope she gets out soon!

Vo.3


this is me on one of my homepasses.i was visiting my cousin chyanne that is in a rehab.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Vo.2


This is me on my first homepass while being in the facility.
i just starting wearing my hair up.